NAUGHTY BY NATURE
So, what is this beast we call anxiety, and why does it keep affecting my life in a negative way? How can such a simple word have such an impact and leave us feeling hopeless? It is unknown how anxiety disorders are derived; but they are likely to involve a combination of factors including genetic, environmental, psychological, and developmental. Since anxiety disorders show up in our family history, this suggests that a combination of genes and environmental stressors may be the cause of the disorder.
There are several types of anxiety disorders - Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Panic Disorder, Phobias, Specific Phobia, Social Anxiety Disorder, and Separation Anxiety Disorder. Anxiety can be a normal reaction to stress which is important because it will alert us to danger, i.e., we know that we shouldn't cross the street in approaching traffic, so it alerts us to look both ways before crossing the street. It becomes a disordered behavior when there is a switch from worry and being nervous, to more excessive fear, avoidance, pre-occupation, overthinking, and/or worry. Each year it is estimated that 2% of the U.S. population has been diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder.
Anxiety disorders can cause people to try to avoid situations that trigger or worsen their symptoms. Job performance, schoolwork, and personal relationships can be affected. In general, for a person to be diagnosed with an anxiety disorder, the fear or anxiety must: be out of proportion to the situation or age-inappropriate; hinder the ability to function normally.
Symptoms of Generalized Anxiety Disorder
Excessive, ongoing worry and tension
Unrealistic view of problems
Restlessness or a feeling of being "edgy"
Trouble concentrating
Tiring easily or being fatigued
Increased crankiness or irritability
Trouble sleeping
Muscle tension or muscle aches and soreness
CHILDREN'S STORY
We may experience worry and periods of being nervous because we have been genetically pre-disposed. If we grew up in a family and witnessed our caregivers being worried or nervous, this is how they responded to difficult situations or stress. Growing up, we may have experienced traumatic situations that caused us to worry, stress, to survive -it was fight or flight. These are what we call environmental factors- such as poverty, our neighborhood, racism, bullying, substance abuse issues in the family, mental health issues/health issues, or disparities. If our caregivers endured a traumatic event while carrying us, or while raising us, their anxiety transcended onto us. In actuality, we didn't have a chance.
There is a term for this and it is called complex -PTSD which is a specific type of PTSD. Also known as developmental trauma, C-PTSD develops in response to long-term trauma or repeated traumatic incidents. This trauma often, but not always, happens during childhood. This sets it apart from PTSD, which commonly occurs in service members but can happen after a single traumatic event at any point in life. Complex PTSD occurs after repeated traumatic events occur such as racism, bullying, caregiver substance abuse, mental health issues/health issues; poverty, environment, being held captive/kidnapped, prisoners of war status, being a victim/refugee of human trafficking, domestic violence, emotional abuse, physical or sexual abuse/neglect in childhood, and/or exposure to organized sexual exploitation.
As it turns out, we spent time blaming ourselves for suffering from anxiety, but in actuality, it was something that was bound to occur because of how we were raised, or an unfortunate prolonged repeated exposure that we didn't ask for that happened earlier in life.
THE TAKE-OVER
Immediately when anxiety becomes excessive - to the point where it can be diagnosed, we start to feel out of control. If you are a person who is used to being in complete control 100% of the time- (Type A Personality), this is going to cause more anxiety. Initially, what you will try to do is control it yourself by putting labels on it, trying to identify what the cause is, all the triggers, denying triggers, and pushing away some thoughts. What happens is you become overwhelmed and defeated by negative thoughts, as you feel out of control, like you lost.
LOSE TO WIN
Like it or not you are in the way. If you are wondering why the anxiety has you feeling hopeless, it is because you are in denial. You have been interfering with the healing process. As you have been trying to control it and get ahead of it, you have not been honest and open. Have you explored the underlining issues? Are you open to exploring the past? Have you denied the triggers because you are afraid to deal with them?
Avoidance is a huge part of anxiety. There may be some things you have encountered recently, that usually, you would have been "stronger" but this time you didn't manage the same, you are human it is okay. You have permission to be human, to go through things to get through things. Trying to control this, thinking, if you aren't able to "control it" means you are "losing", increases your anxiety. Letting go allows you to Win!
THE CHOICE IS YOURS
Become self-aware. The first step in healing is self-awareness. Stop shaming and blaming. You must be open to the healing process. This means in this area you won't have control. You must let someone in to help you. You will need to help yourself by submitting and being honest. Let's identify the triggers - the things you may have been suppressing, and/or denying exist, and just look at what is at the forefront. Let's evaluate what you are going through, give yourself credit, you can't be strong all the time. Seek help from a qualified professional, a coach, counselor, or therapist.
TIME TO REGULATE
Regulate emotions by exploring emotions. Some folks share that it is difficult to follow recommended techniques suggested by professionals. Once in touch with your emotions, find coping skills that are most natural and fit your personality. If you are a writer, then write in a journal. If you have always been creative and had a great imagination, then meditation would be great for you.
If you are a skill-oriented person, then you will need to engage in activities to get your mind off of the anxiety-provoking thought/trigger. A mindfulness activity like identifying items in a room, store, or your favorite books that start with letters of the alphabet, would suit you well. Also, the five-sense grounding technique: where you frequently utilize the five senses—sound, touch, smell, taste, and sight—to closely unite you with the here and now, taking your mind off of the current worry or stressing event/concern, could be a good option.
Practice 5-4-3-2-1 technique. Take five deep breaths and focus on
5 things you see
4 things you feel
3 things you hear
2 things you smell
1 thing you taste
The idea is that the 5-4-3-2-1 technique helps you shift your focus to what’s currently happening around you instead of what’s making you feel anxious.
QUIET STORM
This is it, you are going to quiet the storm. What has been working, is that you have been feeding your brain with negative energy- negative thoughts, overthinking about all of the worst things that could happen. It has you stuck, at a standstill, you are no longer able to do the things you were used to doing, go the places you used to go, and/or believe in the things you used to believe in.
Let's substitute the negative for the positive. Spend time believing that the things you thought you couldn't, could, and the things you thought wouldn't, would. You attract what you think, the more time you spend thinking about something, the odds are, that it will happen. Focus on gratitude, what is going well? Why not think of something positive happening? Despite all of the odds continue to believe that it is possible, that is what you call a miracle right? And suddenly, you will see a shift from hopeless to hopeful.
References:
What are Anxiety Disorders? (n.d.) American Psychiatric Association. Retrieved from https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/anxiety-disorders/what-are-anxiety-disorder
No Joyful Expectation? 9 Types of Hopelessness That May Explain Why (2021) PsychCentral. Retrieved from https://psychcentral.com/anxiety/the-9-types-of-hopelessness-and-how-to-overcome-them#hope-and-vital-needs
Types of Anxiety Disorders Generalized Anxiety Disorder (n.d.) American Psychiatric Association. Retrieved from https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/anxiety-disorders/what-are-anxiety-disorders
An Alternative Approach to the Effects of Multiple Traumas: Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (2015) National Center for Biotechnology Information National Library of Medicine. Retrieved from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5353068/
MBTI Basics (n.d) The Myer Briggs Foundation Organization. Retrieved https://www.myersbriggs.org/my-mbti-personality-type/mbti-basics/
What Is Self-Awareness and Why Is It Important? [+5 Ways to Increase It] (2022) Positive Psychology. Retrieved https://positivepsychology.com/self-awareness-matters-how-you-can-be-more-self-aware/
Getting Started with Mindfulness (2019) Mindful Healthy Mind Healthy Life. Retrieved https://www.mindful.org/meditation/mindfulness-getting-started/
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